My next date with KO was a spa date. Yes, randomly in the middle of the week he reached out to me and asked if I was interested in getting a massage. Who wouldn't jump on such an offer? I was already in bed (lazy day), but I jumped right out and headed to Four Points. Does it count as a date though, since we got massages in separate rooms? I don't know.

Anyway, the first time I met him, he was wearing a suit. I knew he was kind of big, but I just thought it was fat (lol). The second time we hung out, he was wearing a white traditional kaftan (and looked so damn good in it). So imagine my surprise, when he walked into the Four Points lobby in a t-shirt and jogging pants, and each of his arms was the size of my thighs (okay, exaggeration). But he's like soooo fit! In fact, I started feeling a little self conscious, with the little pouch I carry around in my lower tummy. *Note to self: Enroll in a gym and get a personal trainer*.  Just staring at him made me a little shy, and if I were white he would have seen me turn pink; thanks to the naughty thoughts that ran through my head.

The massage was good, I really needed it. And then I showered and met him back at the lobby. He then asked if I wanted to grab a bite. And even though I wasn't hungry, I wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to spend more time with him. So I said yes. And that's how we spent another two hours together. So get this - he started asking about my kids. Like he's actually interested and he paid attention to every little detail.

He walked me out to the parking lot, and then we got in my car together. We talked some more, and then he hugged me goodbye. And just before he got out of the passenger seat, he leaned in and gave me the best kiss of my life!!!

SERIOUSLY. I now get why people get so crazy about kisses. I've always wondered what the big deal was about kissing, but now I get it. Everytime I think about that kiss, there's this feeling I cannot describe deep down inside. Omg. What is this feeling? He did things to my with his tongue I can't even explain. Help! How could a kiss, a simple kiss, leave me feeling like this?


KO continued.

By the time I got home, showered, and got in bed after the wedding, KO had called me 3 times. Or well, it was a number I didn't know, but I knew it had to be him. For one, it was quite late at night. And I don't get random calls at that time of night. I called him back once I was comfortably in bed and we talked very easily until sunrise. I couldn't believe it when I saw the first rays of morning peek through my blinds. He was (and still is) so easy to talk to. We talked about everything. Our backgrounds, growing up, education, work history, dating history. BUT. I skipped my marriage. And the kids. Technically, and by law (and the Church) I've actually never been married. All I had was one flimsy ceremony in my parents' living room. But I digress. He told me all about his business, his expansion plans, and even his humble beginnings (in the business). By the time I got off the phone, the help was up. I gave her instructions to give Laje breakfast and to make sure she didn't wake me up. Then I went to sleep and spent most of Sunday in bed.

Finally, around 3pm I woke up. But it was a different waking up. I hadn't woken up that happy in probably 2 years. Something was bubbling from within me, and I think even Laje (my 6 year old) noticed.
Laje: Mummy, did you eat too much sugar?
Me: HUH? What do you mean?
Laje: Everytime I'm excited and I sing or hop around, you ask me if I ate too much sugar?
Me: Oh. Yes my darling. I had a lot of sugar last night. But I didn't eat it.
Laje: How come it's affecting you if you didn't eat it? What did you do with it?
Me: *At this point realizing I should have just told her I ate it* - Err, I talked to it? (Even I knew that was stupid)
Laje: Mummy you can't talk to sugar, that's food!
Me: Yes my darling, you're right. Anyway, have you done your homework? Let me have a look at it.
Laje: I don't have any homework
Me: Laje! How would you not have any homework on a weekend???
Laje: Okay okay, can you help me do it now?
Me: Go get it and set it up on the table. Let me grab a quick bite.

By the time I was done with Laje's homework, I checked my phone and noticed KO hadn't called or messaged. It was now 5pm or thereabout. Being my usual panicky self, I started thinking of the worst. Had he done some research and found out about my past? Did I say something wrong on the phone? What could have gone wrong? Why hadn't he called? Then I took a bold step, and decided to call him. No answer. That just heightened my panic. And as I always do when I'm about to have a panic attack, I got in bed and buried myself under the covers. All sorts ran through my mind, and I must have fallen asleep.

I was startled by my phone ringing (probably around 7pm), and it was him. KO. I panicked a bit. Then realized it was probably a good idea to just answer.

KO: Hey Fela! How are you? How did you wake up so early? We didn't go to bed before 7am!
Me: Ah ah! 7am to 3pm, that's 8 hours! That's more than enough sleep for any normal person now!
KO: But it wasn't a normal night! Do you know how much you danced last night? You shouldn't be able to walk today, haha.
Me: How do you know how much I danced? You weren't even on the dance floor.
KO: Oh no, I wasn't. But I was somewhere in the hall. Watching your every move. You're such an amazing dancer sha. Like all the other girls were doing the most, trying to be noticed. And you were just there doing your thing, looking so sexy without even trying to or realizing it!
Me: All na wash jare!
KO: You don't believe me? Then how did I meet you at the door right as you were leaving? I was watching you all night. To be honest, I needed to rest my feet because it's been crazy for me since the engagement on Thursday. But once the wedding was officially over, I knew I had to get some rest so I wouldn't pass out. So I got a seat in a corner, and just watched you. It was one hell of a show!
Me: You just know how to constantly keep a girl blushing, don't you?
KO: Anyway, what are you up to tonight? Can we grab a quick drink? You live in Ikoyi yea? I can pick you up in 30 minutes?
Me: Sounds great. I better hop in the shower.
KO: I better make that an hour then. This one you're just about to shower; you women and your serenre
Me: Trust me, I have no interest in serenre. I'm a very simple girl, you'll see. 30 minutes will do.
KO: Ok. Text me your address. See you soon.

By 8pm, we were at this quaint bar in Ikoyi. I've lived in Ikoyi all my life, and I never knew it existed. The ambience was very nice...romantic. The crowd was very different; not your usual Lagos crowd. He must have good taste, I thought. We sat in a corner, secluded from everyone else, but able to see the entire bar clearly.

KO: Mystery Woman. Just yesterday I was staring at you from a distance. I was instantly drawn to you. But I didn't know if it was a good idea to talk to you. You know how Lagos girls can be.
Me: Well, I'm glad you did. Before we go any further though, I have to ask. Are you single? Like fully, 100% single?
KO: Sounds like someone's been burned!
Me: Yea, well, I had a really bad experience once. So basically, is there any girl out there that can claim she's currently having something with you? No matter how insignificant?
KO: Nope. My ex and I broke up about 3 weeks ago. I promised myself I was going to take it easy for a while. But you had to come and ruin that eh, Mystery Woman?
Me: What happened?
KO: That's a very long story for another day. Now, I should ask as well. Are you fully, 100% single?
Me: Yes.
KO: How's someone as beautiful as you single? Abi you're one of the crazy ones?
Me: Not crazy. But it's a very long story.
KO: Well, I'm in no hurry. Tell me.
Me: I'm divorced. Not technically divorced, because I was never officially married. But I was someone's 7th wife. And I have 2 kids with him. And I perfectly understand that our date is probably over now. I don't even know what I was thinking. I can never have a normal life again.
KO: That's all?
Me: *Blank stare*
KO: Ok, I'll be honest. It's a lot. But it's not the end of the world. I still like you. And I'd still love to get to know you. I appreciate your honesty, and based on the few hours of conversation we've had, I have a feeling we're going to get along very well. Again, it's a lot. But I care more about here and now; about the future, than I do about the past.
Me: *Dumbfounded*
KO: Back to deaf and dumb?

And then I burst out laughing. That was the perfect icebreaker. We hung out for about 2 hours, and then he dropped me back at home and like a gentleman, gave me a kiss on my cheek.


Change is here! That's what we were all chanting a few months ago, ba? Change has also come to my life. I've been AWOL for many reasons. The summary is this. I'm in my 30s. I have 2 kids. I was 'married' to a man that I couldn't live with (yes, I said was). And now we've decided to part ways. Some of my friends haven't even gotten married the first time. And I'm already looking for my second marriage. Okay, maybe I'm not looking to get married. After my ex and I decided to call it quits, I promised myself a year of aloneness and celibacy. I lasted only three months. Not because I wasn't strong enough, but because I met a guy I thought was worth giving it all up for. He brought a lot of sunshine into my otherwise dark world. I might someday tell you the story of why I left my ex (or maybe he left me). But for now, I'd like to focus on the happy part, aka the new man.

Let's call him KO! I call him KO (as in knock out) because of what he does to me every time I get in bed with him. But also because it's his initials (please don't try to guess who it is). I met KO at a wedding. Weddings are apparently a really good place to meet guys; just FYI. Anyways, I was sat at a table alone (because my friend went to the bathroom) when he slid into her seat and asked what my name was. I refused to say, and just smiled at him. He asked again, "What's your name? I'm KO." Still, I sat there smiling. But he didn't give up. I think at some point, he thought I was deaf and dumb? Because he brought out his phone, opened the  note pad app, and proceeded to type on there, "I'm KO, what's your name?". When he handed the phone to me and I saw what he'd typed, I actually burst out laughing. And then I said to him, "You think I'm deaf and dumb?", to which he replied "My bad, you just kept smiling at me and the expression on your face never changed."

We laughed about it all, and that's how we got talking. But I still didn't tell him my name. He asked if I wanted to take a walk outside, and I was more than happy to get some fresh air. You know Lagos weddings can be a bit much. So I waited for my friend to return from the bathroom, and off I went with KO. We walked into the parking lot, and then he asked if I wanted to go into his car and talk there. We did, and that's when he said, "You still haven't told me your name, mystery woman." Something about him calling me 'mystery woman' tickled me. So I responded, "Why don't you just call me mystery woman?"

KO: So, Mystery Woman, what or who brought you to this wedding today?
Me: I have no idea why I'm  here. I really didn't want to come. But my friend refused to go alone. So I guess I came here as a wingman. Why are you here?
KO: The groom is my brother.
Me: Oh. Wow. Now that you say it, I see the resemblance. So why are we out here? You should be in there!!!!
KO: Nah, it's cool. I've been in there all day. Even in the morning, before any guests came. I need this break. And who better to spend these few minutes of calm and quiet with than the most beautiful girl at the party.
Me: Oh here we go. That's about the worst lie ever!
KO: I mean it. I see all the flashily clad women in there with all the layers of make up. And I won't lie. There are many hot babes in there. But you're the only one that caught my eye. And you caught my eye as soon as you walked in. You walked in with your friend, and I saw you hug some guy in a navy suit. My heart almost broke when you hugged him. I kept thinking 'Please don't sit with him. Please don't be his girlfriend.' Imagine my joy when you hugged him and kept moving. And then I kept waiting for the perfect time to talk to you. I kept waiting for you to be alone. And when your friend went to the bathroom, I knew that was my chance.
KO: Wait. Are you shy?
KO: Do you see why I thought you were deaf and dumb?

And then I burst out laughing. I'm not sure why the deaf and dumb thing gets me everytime. And even until now, it still serves as a good joke in certain situations.

KO: So what do you do, Mystery Lady?
Me: I'm in the process of setting up a travel business.
KO: Oh? A travel agency?
Me: Yes. But not in the regular naija sense where all they do is sell you tickets. It's going to be a full service agency, crafting entire holidays, cruises, and all that good stuff.
KO: Interesting. Beauty and brains.
Me: Thanks! So, what do you do?
KO: I have a haulage business.
Me: Oh? Sand, gravel, and all that stuff?
KO: No, oil & gas. Diesel really.
Me: That's cool. Oil  & gas big boy things!
KO: Yea right. Me I'm a hustler o. No where near big boy. That's the dream sha. To be a Lagos big boy.
Me: Not sure how I feel about Lagos big boys
KO: Don't worry. I'm nothing like those boys. I better ask right away, do you have a boyfriend?
Me: Nope. (I sighed a sigh of relief; that he didn't ask if I had kids.)
KO: You're very beautiful, mystery woman.
Me: ....silence....
KO: Ah ah! What is it with you and your deaf and dumb, on & off?
Me: You asked if I was shy. I'm very shy. And I never know how to react or respond when I get a compliment.
KO: A simple 'Thank you', perhaps?
Me: Okay. Thank you.
KO: And your body is amazing. I know you tried to hide it in that loose dress. But I can see.
Me: Thank you. And guilty as charged, the dress is supposed to hide everything.
KO: Why would you want to drown your body in such a loose dress? If you've got it, flaunt it, no?
Me: I'm not really in a flaunting mood.
KO: Hmm. Okay o. Are you ready to go back in?
Me: Sure. I should go keep my friend company. Although I'm sure she would have found some friends to chill with.

And then he did a strange thing. He held my hand as we walked back out of the parking lot and into the hall. He walked me to my seat, gave me a kiss on the cheek, and said, 'Don't leave without saying goodbye.' I tried to talk some sense into my own head. I reminded myself of my one year aloneness and celibacy plan. So I decided that even if he came back to me, I wouldn't let him take it any further.

The rest of the wedding was fun. In fact, it's probably the most fun I've ever had at a wedding. We were there until 2am! It pretty much turned into a club. The DJ was so amazing we danced for three hours straight without catching a break. I kept looking for KO on the dance floor, but I never saw him. I figured he was an oniranu that had probably taken another girl into his car to talk. I decided to 'face my front', since I didn't want to get into anything with any guy anyways.

As we were exiting the hall a few minutes past 2am, someone grabbed my waist from behind. I turned around, ready to slap whoever it was. And then I saw it was KO. We locked eyes for a few seconds, and my heart jumped. I promise you, I felt something I've never felt. I can't say it was love at first sight, because I don't believe in that. However, it was something at first sight. I let him leave his had on the small of my back, and he walked us to the car. When we got to the car, he asked for my number, and I gave it to him. He insisted on calling my phone, to be sure I gave him the right number. And then he asked, how do I store your number without a name? That's when I told him my name was Fela O.

To be continued...